My dearest ambitions, circa 1999

This post is a bit of a cheat, as I posted this on the facebook a few months ago, but I have a real post percolating, and until that's ready, you can have this. When I was about thirteen, I made a list of fifty things to do in my lifetime. I have achieved sixteen of them.

When I was thirteen, I thought of myself as a finished product. It was inconceivable that I would change my goals or opinions. I would imagine a lot of thirteen-year-olds feel that way. Yet here I am now, looking at this list. There are some things on here (#35, camp in the everglades) that don't seem at all appealing now. Some of them (#05, swim 20 laps) wouldn't happen if I wanted them to. A suprising number of them are still very real desires. Anyhow, here they are, with some new commentary.



01: Go to every continent. [I have since progressed from one to three]
02: Take a show on tour. [This was responsible for one of the three continents]
03: Get a role in a Youth Opera show. [I probably shouldn't have put such time-specific things on the list]
04: Live on the water.
05: Swim 20 laps. [Seriously, I don't remember wanting this. I liked swimming, but I wasn't that ambitious.]
06: Attend the Oscars.
07: Write a good song. [Was I writing bad songs? I guess so, but those were all for facetious musicals.]
08: Attend the Olympics
09: Give an acceptance speech
10: Do West Side Story [I still want this one, so very badly. I suppose at the time I wanted to play Anybodys.]
11: Build a snowman. [I only had to wait five more years.]
12: Swim in the Pacific. [Again with the swimming!]
13: Learn a foreign language.
14: Learn ASL
15: Direct Musicals. [Hey, I achieved that like two years later. Nice.]
16: Never smoke a cigarette. [I'm such a goody-goody.]
17: Get married.
18: Have kids.
19: Fall in love. [I suppose I have. But not in the way I would have imagined at thirteen.]
20: Live in a Big City
21: Visit Alaska. [This was, of course, inspired by Northern Exposure.]
22: Get in a fistfight. [I'm going to assume it only counts if it's a real fight and not for fun.]
23: Make straight A's [One semester of sophomore year of high school. That was it.]
24: Do a proper production of Unibomber!
25: High-five a nun. [I liked nuns so very much. And, I guess, high-fives.]
26: Read the complete works of Shakespeare. [What a hack. I'm glad he's dead.]
27: Read the complete works of CS Lewis.
28: Read the entire Bible straight through.
29: Be on a sitcom [sub in "write for a sitcom" and yes, please.]
30: Direct a music video. [My own mother beat me to it!]
31: Wear a prosthesis for my finger.
32: Own multiple pairs of glasses. [I still want this, and I talk about it all the time.]
33: Be on a Stark Trek series.
34: Ride Kumba & Montu. [What the hell. I didn't like rollercoasters that much.]
35: Camp in the Everglades.
36: Go to a Hurricane Party.
37: Throw a really huge Halloween Party. [Done, done, and done.]
38: Start a theatre.
39: Ride horses. [Multiple horses.]
40: Break into a building.
41: Meet George Harrison. [I really shouldn't have included time-specific things!]
42: Sing the blues.
43: Solve a crime. [I blame Encyclopedia Brown.]
44: Have a secret affair with a celebrity. [Secret? Was it just for the excitement, or did I know then that I was a gayfer?]
45: Never have a cavity. Take that!
46: Never break a bone. [And again.]
47: Keep a journal.
48: Invent something. [the Gin Criswell, and the definitive Kirkland coat check system]
49: Write a serial comic strip.
50: Achieve immortality. [Pending]